Imagine driving along loving life and a song comes on the radio that snaps you back into another time and space. Or a song pops into your head and you start going down memory lane with a past lover. Do you have a special song that reminds you of each lover?
One song that came to me early in a relationship and seem to dominate my head for the year long affair was The Clash song SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I GO. That seemed to be a pertinent question which I finally got answered. Yet another five year affair was dominated by Sting's WHEN WE DANCE. Come to think of it, we did go out dancing alot.
Polled some of my girls and we created this list in case you are musically challenged.
Joan Jett I HATE MYSELF FOR LOVING YOU
The Police EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE also handy if you have a stalker
Adele SOMEONE LIKE YOU good breakup song
Marvin Gaye SEXUAL HEALING
Whitney Houston I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU pulls at your heartstrings
Van Morrison BROWN EYED GIRL
Sugar Loaf GREEN EYED LADY
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
SHE'S JUST NOT INTO YOU
When a man meets a woman and she gives him her Facebook contact only, she's just not into him. With all the social media available there seems to be a hierarchy of interest level between the sexes. You would think this would make communication easier. But you must read between the social media lines.
If she really wants to date him, she will call his cell phone while standing next to him.
If mildly interested, she asks him to call her cell phone while standing next to him and then she's in control.
Email addresses may be exchanged if she is ambivalent. Then she has an out if the email winds up in her junk mail.
Giving a Facebook account to a man is a definite dis. She either has alot of baggage she does not want to get into or she is really not interested.
It is exhausting to deceifer the social media dating codes. Just speak the truth. It could be very refreshing and liberating.
If she really wants to date him, she will call his cell phone while standing next to him.
If mildly interested, she asks him to call her cell phone while standing next to him and then she's in control.
Email addresses may be exchanged if she is ambivalent. Then she has an out if the email winds up in her junk mail.
Giving a Facebook account to a man is a definite dis. She either has alot of baggage she does not want to get into or she is really not interested.
It is exhausting to deceifer the social media dating codes. Just speak the truth. It could be very refreshing and liberating.
Monday, May 16, 2011
PSYCHIC VAMPIRES
Vampires are romanticized in the media. Woman seen to be falling in love with them in books and movies ignoring the personal cost. I am not talking about immortal vampires such as one found in fiction, but rather a mortal person that sucks the life, breathe and fun out of you. PSYCHIC VAMPIRES
Psychic vampires are walking this earth everywhere. They are the person you can't wait to leave when you are together. You are exhausted and drained after an encounter. Often times you feel guilty that you want to run away from them. But that is their motive to manipulate and control you and make you feel responsible for their emotional state. That makes them feel better for a short time. PV feed on your positive energy very much like the blood sucking vampires.
To avoid these PV, set boundaries around your psyche. If you simply refuse to accept that the PV can harm you and actually believe this to be true, then little or no harm can come to you.
Psychic vampires are walking this earth everywhere. They are the person you can't wait to leave when you are together. You are exhausted and drained after an encounter. Often times you feel guilty that you want to run away from them. But that is their motive to manipulate and control you and make you feel responsible for their emotional state. That makes them feel better for a short time. PV feed on your positive energy very much like the blood sucking vampires.
To avoid these PV, set boundaries around your psyche. If you simply refuse to accept that the PV can harm you and actually believe this to be true, then little or no harm can come to you.
Sunday, May 15, 2011
MANSCAPING-PUERTO RICO UPDATE
The blurry eyed, alcohol saturated research team just returned from Puerto Rico with their carefully collected data. They were studying the manscaping habits of the native Puerto Rican male. The test group was hot looking heterosexual males from 28-40 years old that reside in PR. The researchers were hot looking American blondes over 35.
Research Findings:
All 100% percentile were shaved cleaned of body hair except on head.
Eyebrows were waxed and plucked perfectly.
50% of the test group was uncircumsized. TMI
1% rocked a penis piercing.
Thank you ladies for the in depth reporting. The research team commented that the native PR men are very attentive and adventuresome lovers. However, 50% did not carry condoms with them. I will reimburse the team for the expenditure. They also learned a tried and true method of attracting hot PR men. When you gaze upon a looker you want, lock eyes and point at him. Then motion with your pointed finger for him to come to you. Sounds very scientific, no?
The team of researchers are eager to continue the investigation into the PR men very soon.
Research Findings:
All 100% percentile were shaved cleaned of body hair except on head.
Eyebrows were waxed and plucked perfectly.
50% of the test group was uncircumsized. TMI
1% rocked a penis piercing.
Thank you ladies for the in depth reporting. The research team commented that the native PR men are very attentive and adventuresome lovers. However, 50% did not carry condoms with them. I will reimburse the team for the expenditure. They also learned a tried and true method of attracting hot PR men. When you gaze upon a looker you want, lock eyes and point at him. Then motion with your pointed finger for him to come to you. Sounds very scientific, no?
The team of researchers are eager to continue the investigation into the PR men very soon.
Friday, May 13, 2011
HANDBOOK FOR A HOOKUP
Urban Dictionary's definition of a HOOKUP: Intimacy with a member of preferred sex that you do not consider a significant other. When said by age 50+, it probably means spending time together. For my purpose I am talking about hooking up for SEX.
1.Must be sexual chemistry or what's the purpose.
2.All parties must agree HU is purely for sex. NO STRINGS ATTACHED
3.Full disclosure is mandatory. Any STD's or other quirks must be discussed.
4.Sober is best, but a buzz is acceptable.
5.Practice safe sex. Take turns buying the condoms.
6.Sleep over is acceptable if agreeable to all.
7.Acceptable to ask for what turns you on.
8.Acceptable to decline if request does not feel right for you.
9.Show respect for each other. Do not answer the phone or text unless it is a legitimate emergency.
10. Either party can initiate another HU. Girls you don't have to wait for him to contact you.
11. When you do agree to another HU, show up or contact each other otherwise. Respect again.
12.If you never want to see each other again, just say NO. Have the courage to say NO.
I am sure there are many more situations that need addressing in this HANDBOOK FOR A HOOKUP. This is a work in progress. Many thanks to Robin for her contributions.
Wishing you all Happy Hookups!!
1.Must be sexual chemistry or what's the purpose.
2.All parties must agree HU is purely for sex. NO STRINGS ATTACHED
3.Full disclosure is mandatory. Any STD's or other quirks must be discussed.
4.Sober is best, but a buzz is acceptable.
5.Practice safe sex. Take turns buying the condoms.
6.Sleep over is acceptable if agreeable to all.
7.Acceptable to ask for what turns you on.
8.Acceptable to decline if request does not feel right for you.
9.Show respect for each other. Do not answer the phone or text unless it is a legitimate emergency.
10. Either party can initiate another HU. Girls you don't have to wait for him to contact you.
11. When you do agree to another HU, show up or contact each other otherwise. Respect again.
12.If you never want to see each other again, just say NO. Have the courage to say NO.
I am sure there are many more situations that need addressing in this HANDBOOK FOR A HOOKUP. This is a work in progress. Many thanks to Robin for her contributions.
Wishing you all Happy Hookups!!
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
U Smelt it, U Dealt it
We're not talking about farts either. If my thinkin' is stinkin' and my life is in trauma/drama, I am stuck in victim consciousness. I am allowing others to effect my life. Victim consciousness is basically blaming everyone outside of me for my troubles. Especially but not limited to my parents, boss, boyfriend, landlord and even GOD.
Let's go back to high school physics. " For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. " What I focus on becomes my reality. Every action and thought creates either my trauma/drama or my fun, exciting life.
How do I change my trauma/drama and become the author of my own life, you ask?
*Make a list of what is working in your life. Not everything can be crap.
*Focus or meditate on the goodness with gratitude. No BUTS or WHAT IF.
*Daydream, fantasize, blog about what you want to create in your life daily.
*Monitor every thought and keep it positive.
"Whether you think you can, or think you can't...either way you are right." Henry Ford
Let's go back to high school physics. " For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. " What I focus on becomes my reality. Every action and thought creates either my trauma/drama or my fun, exciting life.
How do I change my trauma/drama and become the author of my own life, you ask?
*Make a list of what is working in your life. Not everything can be crap.
*Focus or meditate on the goodness with gratitude. No BUTS or WHAT IF.
*Daydream, fantasize, blog about what you want to create in your life daily.
*Monitor every thought and keep it positive.
"Whether you think you can, or think you can't...either way you are right." Henry Ford
Monday, May 9, 2011
Tiger DNA
There really is Tiger DNA. It's not because a celebrity is spouting off about it. The tiger is one of the twelve animal signs in the ancient Chinese zodiac. In Chinese astrology, tigers symbolize power, dignity, bravery and leadership. Tigers may not be kings of the jungles, but they have been deeply rooted in Chinese folklore for centuries. Those born under the sign of the tiger in Chinese astrology can say they really do have Tiger DNA.
Born leader is the key phrase for tigers. Born to lead rather than to obey.
Young males born under the sign of the tiger are the kind of guys every father with a daughter fears. He is the typical bad boy that women seem to find irresistable. Mr Tiger is brave, confident and daring. Famous tigers are Tom Cruise and Leonardo Di Caprio.
Tiger women are beautiful and alluring. They are the dream of many young men. One famous tiger lady was Marilyn Monroe, an iconic sex symbol.
Check out Chinese astrology for a fascinating read and you may even learn about yourself and your relationships.
Born leader is the key phrase for tigers. Born to lead rather than to obey.
Young males born under the sign of the tiger are the kind of guys every father with a daughter fears. He is the typical bad boy that women seem to find irresistable. Mr Tiger is brave, confident and daring. Famous tigers are Tom Cruise and Leonardo Di Caprio.
Tiger women are beautiful and alluring. They are the dream of many young men. One famous tiger lady was Marilyn Monroe, an iconic sex symbol.
Check out Chinese astrology for a fascinating read and you may even learn about yourself and your relationships.
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Manscaping
Manscaping: a word to describe mans grooming of his body hair. Like landscaping, but for the body. Male grooming is not just for cleanliness purposes. Having no pubic hair is the equivalent of wearing vertical stripes. It adds the appearance of length.
Personally, I have nothing against chest hair, in moderation. But the full on gorilla suit can be a turn off.
Even the back hair can be a bit dicey at times. Men, ask a female friend her advice about your hairiness factor if you have doubt.
Obviously, body hair is a cultural standard. Europeans are just fine with hair on underarms and legs. Many Euro women are considered the most beautiful in the world. While Brazil is the leader in waxing.
American women have made hair removal a multi billion dollar industry.
My Bestie, Jill, tells me the Puerto Rican men are totally hairless. Even their eyebrows are perfectly groomed. Maybe, this is NuevoRicans only. She's going to PR soon and I am waiting for the low down. Have a good trip and consider this as cultural research.
Personally, I have nothing against chest hair, in moderation. But the full on gorilla suit can be a turn off.
Even the back hair can be a bit dicey at times. Men, ask a female friend her advice about your hairiness factor if you have doubt.
Obviously, body hair is a cultural standard. Europeans are just fine with hair on underarms and legs. Many Euro women are considered the most beautiful in the world. While Brazil is the leader in waxing.
American women have made hair removal a multi billion dollar industry.
My Bestie, Jill, tells me the Puerto Rican men are totally hairless. Even their eyebrows are perfectly groomed. Maybe, this is NuevoRicans only. She's going to PR soon and I am waiting for the low down. Have a good trip and consider this as cultural research.
Friday, May 6, 2011
Sex and the Spiritual Single
Is the relationship between a man and his penis the only true intimacy he will experience in his life time? Psychologist say that his mother is his first love, but I believe his penis might be first.
It's right there protruding from his body always with him. He fondles it lovingly and even gives it a name. His every thought is concerning its care and attention. Men often say that their penis has a mind of their own. One guy I dated told me "my penis is not as evolved as I am". Giving his penis permission to behave badly and to justify his behavior. Standing at attention when ogling women's bodies like he can't take responsibility for its actions.
"Baby you want my big penis?" Don't all men think they have a great one, regardless of the size or shape? Please men, understand, women really want caressing, touching and loving more than a big one. It's the approach he takes to entering a woman's vagina that really matters. Do this in a respectful, loving and gentle manner and you have won her over. Try this especially for the first time that you are intimate with each other. Not acting like some caveman that can't control his urges.
Stop and Think about this. Understand the beauty of her womb, the center of creation. Her value as a nurturer and a creator. The feminine aspect of softness. View your lovers body as if you are experiencing a priceless work of art. Take time to explore and touch her sensuously and longingly. Savor, breath and relax. Notice the smell and texture of her skin.
And women you do the same for your man.
It's right there protruding from his body always with him. He fondles it lovingly and even gives it a name. His every thought is concerning its care and attention. Men often say that their penis has a mind of their own. One guy I dated told me "my penis is not as evolved as I am". Giving his penis permission to behave badly and to justify his behavior. Standing at attention when ogling women's bodies like he can't take responsibility for its actions.
"Baby you want my big penis?" Don't all men think they have a great one, regardless of the size or shape? Please men, understand, women really want caressing, touching and loving more than a big one. It's the approach he takes to entering a woman's vagina that really matters. Do this in a respectful, loving and gentle manner and you have won her over. Try this especially for the first time that you are intimate with each other. Not acting like some caveman that can't control his urges.
Stop and Think about this. Understand the beauty of her womb, the center of creation. Her value as a nurturer and a creator. The feminine aspect of softness. View your lovers body as if you are experiencing a priceless work of art. Take time to explore and touch her sensuously and longingly. Savor, breath and relax. Notice the smell and texture of her skin.
And women you do the same for your man.
Blow Job or Joy?
The act of fellatio is slangily called a blow job or bj. Most men find this very erotic and satisfying. Some men won't ask for it but will simply push your head toward his genitals. Cowards? Bullies? Afraid to ask for what will satisfy them?
Some women may find fellatio extremely vile. Especially if they are being forced or manipulated and the man is not asking in a loving way. Ask for a blow joy from your partner in a loving manner explaining how good it will make you feel.
1.{ Using your partner's name} I would truly love for you to honor me with a blow joy because it makes me feel {more connected to you, fulfilled, loved, adventurous}. Choose your own descriptive words.
2.Express your feelings and gratitude after the blow joy. Cuddle.
Ladies shift your thinking. If your partner asks for a blow joy in a loving manner and your truly want to please your partner make it a joy for both of you.
Some women may find fellatio extremely vile. Especially if they are being forced or manipulated and the man is not asking in a loving way. Ask for a blow joy from your partner in a loving manner explaining how good it will make you feel.
1.{ Using your partner's name} I would truly love for you to honor me with a blow joy because it makes me feel {more connected to you, fulfilled, loved, adventurous}. Choose your own descriptive words.
2.Express your feelings and gratitude after the blow joy. Cuddle.
Ladies shift your thinking. If your partner asks for a blow joy in a loving manner and your truly want to please your partner make it a joy for both of you.
WANT TO PLAY WITH MY CAMERA LITTLE GIRL
Recently, I attended an art opening with a girlfriend on a Saturday evening. David approached me as I was looking at a beautiful photo on display. We had a nice chat about art, spirituality and photography in a span of maybe five minutes. Later, we interfaced again and he told me about his photography interest and asked about mine. I said I had interest but no camera. He was supposedly a professional photographer. He invited me to cohost a photography meetup around the city and offered me the use of his camera equipment. The gallery owners and all involved agreed this was a great idea. I left him my business card and two days later got a message to call him. I returned the call all excited about getting back into photography. Instead he asked me on a date. I politely declined. When I asked about the meetup group, he said since you won't go out with me you cannot use my camera equipment. He preceded to say that he thought about me all weekend and had not had a date in 5 years. This was creepy!
Was this guy lying to me from the onset to get my phone number? I challenged him to be friends only and shoot some photos together. Nothing doing.
Men please brush up on your dating skills before getting in the dating pool. Mixed messages can be perceived as lying. No one wants to be misled!
Was this guy lying to me from the onset to get my phone number? I challenged him to be friends only and shoot some photos together. Nothing doing.
Men please brush up on your dating skills before getting in the dating pool. Mixed messages can be perceived as lying. No one wants to be misled!
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
FILF
Lately, it seems the MILF's get alot of exposure but not the fathers....
As I was shopping at the mall, I couldn't help but notice the hot, ripped fathers standing by the carousel while their children went round and round. Whether they were entertaining their darlings while mom shopped or it was their weekend for custody, I was truly stimulated. Dads in tight shorts and beautiful abs are a sight to behold. This was such a turn-on watching the fathers fawning over their children. My imagination created this seductive fantasy that dad must be really nurturing, gentle and adoring. All attributes I value in a man. In this time of sexual drought for me, these FATHERS I'D LIKE TO FUCK are certainly appetizing.
As I was shopping at the mall, I couldn't help but notice the hot, ripped fathers standing by the carousel while their children went round and round. Whether they were entertaining their darlings while mom shopped or it was their weekend for custody, I was truly stimulated. Dads in tight shorts and beautiful abs are a sight to behold. This was such a turn-on watching the fathers fawning over their children. My imagination created this seductive fantasy that dad must be really nurturing, gentle and adoring. All attributes I value in a man. In this time of sexual drought for me, these FATHERS I'D LIKE TO FUCK are certainly appetizing.
Monday, May 2, 2011
Girls Next Door
Sitting around Sunday with my BFF, Julia, brunching on orgasmic quiche and brioche from Champs-Elysees Bakery when the conversation shifted to men. She had a conversation with a 40 something, good looking American guy this week. He said "My friends and I look for girls everywhere but next door. We only date foreign born girls especially Asian because American girls are too violent."
I never thought of American women as violent. Just the opposite. Many girls have had violence against them in some form eg. bullying, abuse sexual and verbal abuse. Are American girls feeling entitled to the good life and are they disappointed in the boys that cannot offer them such a life? Maybe the boys are feeling unable or unwillinging to perform those duties: the perfect house, car and engagement ring.
Do expectations need to be examined?
It really is up to each person to fulfill their own expectations and needs. It is nice to have a companion that is on the same wavelength with the same goals and aspirations. But often that does not occur. So the responsibility once again falls back on me.
I never thought of American women as violent. Just the opposite. Many girls have had violence against them in some form eg. bullying, abuse sexual and verbal abuse. Are American girls feeling entitled to the good life and are they disappointed in the boys that cannot offer them such a life? Maybe the boys are feeling unable or unwillinging to perform those duties: the perfect house, car and engagement ring.
Do expectations need to be examined?
It really is up to each person to fulfill their own expectations and needs. It is nice to have a companion that is on the same wavelength with the same goals and aspirations. But often that does not occur. So the responsibility once again falls back on me.
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